Holding in my hands one of the hard-copy Day One Journal volumes I recently had made to contain in print these Substack essays, I realized that the sense of completion I’d been feeling the last month or so was in fact real.
Thanks very much Karen. No one can know their destination, but each choice of pathway to whatever it is makes up the adventure. I really believe, in the end, that the destination is a life with few regrets.
I regret that I'm not "publishing" the essays in book form. The half dozen I recently had printed were for my own library and for close relatives. All of the essays will remain here on Substack, though, accessible into the indeterminate future. It sounds as if we share a bibliophile's appreciation of a nice, hardbound volume in our hands, so sorry to disappoint on this count. It's just that the economics and the time investment required just don't make it viable. Thanks for your interest!
I have greatly appreciated your writing here and in your book. My journey as a caregiver ended 3 years ago. My husband and I were together for 45 years and I was his caregiver for the final 7 years of his life. I am still figuring out how to rebuild my life. Thank you for sharing your experience. I have found it to be a deeply moving guide.
Thank you so much Fay. Our past experiences sound as if they overlapped in many ways. It means a lot to know that my narratives have helped. Those forty-five years are in the core of who you are, and they're your strong scaffold. Keep moving forward, growth never stops.
I am 3/4 the way through Dear Judy and I love it so much. It's taking me longer than usual to read this book because your writing and choice of words is so beautiful that I have to reread sentences over and over. You are such a good writer and I am so appreciative of your skills! Thank you for giving so much of yourself to write this very special, profound book. You deserve a break from this topic which I completely understand. I look forward to reading what you come up with for your next topics. All my best from NH.
I’ve only just recently found you here, but this essay both disappoints and compels me. Disappoints because I am in the midst of a caregiving journey for my husband. Compels because it reminds me that if I should be fortunate enough to survive him, life will still be waiting for me. I look forward to reading more from you, whenever and whatever.
Thanks for your insights. The last eight months worth of these essays are available here, and I hope you'll find useful perspectives in them. The full story is contained in my memoir "Dear Judy: A Love Story Rewritten by Alzheimer's" and it's available online, from bookstores, and some libraries. I will continue to post here periodically, and hope I'll touch on subjects that resonate for you and other readers. I'm finding my way through the territory of aging and writing is a way to come to terms with it. All best...
Thank you. My caregiver journey is an intrinsic part of me and informs my perspective, but I don't want it to define me. You express this thought much more eloquently than I do! Good luck and I look forward to what is coming.
That's a wise insight, Vicki, about not wanting your caregiving journey to define you. I think we all form multiple identities in the course of our lives, and if we're lucky, they fuse and metamorphose as integrity, the essence of our moral core and what keeps us building forward. To lack integrity, to lack spine, is the worst fate. Caregiving demands integrity, and it's an expression of both one's strong sense of self, and of compassion for the loved one. Integrity is a defense against fools and cowards, and there are far too many of those loose in our world today. Hold to your truth.
Love this piece of writing so much. You offer much insight to the artist whose practice shifts.
Thanks very much Karen. No one can know their destination, but each choice of pathway to whatever it is makes up the adventure. I really believe, in the end, that the destination is a life with few regrets.
How do I go about purchasing a physical a copy of essays/book?
I regret that I'm not "publishing" the essays in book form. The half dozen I recently had printed were for my own library and for close relatives. All of the essays will remain here on Substack, though, accessible into the indeterminate future. It sounds as if we share a bibliophile's appreciation of a nice, hardbound volume in our hands, so sorry to disappoint on this count. It's just that the economics and the time investment required just don't make it viable. Thanks for your interest!
I have greatly appreciated your writing here and in your book. My journey as a caregiver ended 3 years ago. My husband and I were together for 45 years and I was his caregiver for the final 7 years of his life. I am still figuring out how to rebuild my life. Thank you for sharing your experience. I have found it to be a deeply moving guide.
Thank you so much Fay. Our past experiences sound as if they overlapped in many ways. It means a lot to know that my narratives have helped. Those forty-five years are in the core of who you are, and they're your strong scaffold. Keep moving forward, growth never stops.
Thank you. I appreciate this
I am 3/4 the way through Dear Judy and I love it so much. It's taking me longer than usual to read this book because your writing and choice of words is so beautiful that I have to reread sentences over and over. You are such a good writer and I am so appreciative of your skills! Thank you for giving so much of yourself to write this very special, profound book. You deserve a break from this topic which I completely understand. I look forward to reading what you come up with for your next topics. All my best from NH.
Thank you Susie for your very kind and generous words. I'm heartened and grateful.
I’ve only just recently found you here, but this essay both disappoints and compels me. Disappoints because I am in the midst of a caregiving journey for my husband. Compels because it reminds me that if I should be fortunate enough to survive him, life will still be waiting for me. I look forward to reading more from you, whenever and whatever.
Thanks for your insights. The last eight months worth of these essays are available here, and I hope you'll find useful perspectives in them. The full story is contained in my memoir "Dear Judy: A Love Story Rewritten by Alzheimer's" and it's available online, from bookstores, and some libraries. I will continue to post here periodically, and hope I'll touch on subjects that resonate for you and other readers. I'm finding my way through the territory of aging and writing is a way to come to terms with it. All best...
Thank you. My caregiver journey is an intrinsic part of me and informs my perspective, but I don't want it to define me. You express this thought much more eloquently than I do! Good luck and I look forward to what is coming.
That's a wise insight, Vicki, about not wanting your caregiving journey to define you. I think we all form multiple identities in the course of our lives, and if we're lucky, they fuse and metamorphose as integrity, the essence of our moral core and what keeps us building forward. To lack integrity, to lack spine, is the worst fate. Caregiving demands integrity, and it's an expression of both one's strong sense of self, and of compassion for the loved one. Integrity is a defense against fools and cowards, and there are far too many of those loose in our world today. Hold to your truth.
This is such an important (and, as always, eloquent) post. You know I will follow you anywhere in your writing. On to the next deeper, wider thing.